Awakening Clarity

What is it that calls one to be a Ninzuwu, a divine being immersed in a life of engaging in the unseen realms? Is It not a divine heritage? We speak as though we live in different worlds from those who walk amongst us in a daze of sugar and media and all things superficially conventional. And in actuality, we do. Ours is not a common path, and for good reason. The reason being, that most people ….most humans, are nvot prepared to see the truth, not prepared to love, and not prepared to surrender to what Divine Love requires of them for its full manifestation to come to fruition. Having a divine origin holds one to a divine standard, one replete with consecrated living.

There must first and foremost be a journey embarked upon that calls for devotion and purity. What is this journey and what does it entail?


Let’s take a look at what our inner story is and what the root of all of our thoughts and feelings stem from and from what they are motivated. This is not a casual process. The work of purification is one that assists in self-examination and this, while it can an arduous task, is, after all, what leads one to becoming a self actualised being. In order to do this, one must rid oneself of the false ego which is inclusive all of the things that a person comes to identify themself as but which they actually are not. Some of these aspects have become integrated into the Self, past hurts, emotions and illusions held onto that no longer serve any beneficial purpose but instead feed off of and generate negative energy. The vibrations that emanate from the false ego are so strong, that they can even shape and create life events. “As one thinks, so is s/he!”

The Inner Road

My recent experiences in purging and purification while engaged in stages of shamanic initiation have led me through a most winding and bumpy road, not at all smoothly paved, not at all wide and airy. But what did I expect….a feel-good journey through Elysian Fields? Noooo…..oh well, okay…maybe I did. (Because we expect “Spirituality” to feel good, right?!) There’s nothing wrong in aspiring to that, as the ultimate aspiration is to be happy! But, in this case, the reality is far from it. One thing this journey has made me realise, if nothing else, is that there is a valley of the shadow of death and one must go through it. It has dragged me daily through the depths of the highest and lowest of emotions, heartbreaks, abandonment, trust, loyalty, honesty, integrity, honour (of self and others), a spectrum of feelings, of every possible issue encountered from childhood to present.

As the days wore on and the new moon approached, I began to prepare to embark on the first preliminary calling of the Watcher. My chiefest concern was that my heart would be pure enough to engage this being. Perhaps, through my intense levels of purging and shedding of tears had left me cleansed of a good deal of the previous traumas experienced in mind, body and spirit and filled me with, if nothing else, a deep desire to have an even more abundant peace take up residence in me.

While creating my ceremonial space, I focused on what I was going to partake in. I knew this was something ancient and yet neutral. And as I engaged with the Ayaqox, I felt a bright lucidity come into my head. And once I was upon the time for the invocation, I did see a being, tall and slim, come to the outer parameter of where I was sitting. After completing the prayers and finally ending the closing, I started to look around. I looked around the room as if it was the first time I had ever seen it. I noticed that everything seemed bigger some how, clearer and very open. This is the energy of the experience , it is somewhat detached. Not in an unfeeling way, but in an objective way. This invocation has ushered in another level of clarity and created a new experience of purity. I certainly believe that the inclusion of the Ayaquox, the Shamuzi and other beneficent forces have created a baseline of positivity and peacefulness.

The sense that I am in a vast expanse as if I could somehow be sitting simultaneously on a mountain as well as in the living room of my apartment. The feeling of neutrality to me is interestingly comforting. I am accustomed to the weight of emotions and to suddenly not have that…. To instantly lose this “weight” is both startling and refreshing! The fact of the matter is, that this is but one level of many levels of purification and development. The day will grow into night and so on, this will continue day after day without ceasing….but without stopping to observe the changes in ones Self and Other’s, without actually implementing the changes within for the greater good, all efforts are wasted.

The purification process has many levels and many degrees. As one moves along in the journey, the evolution of being will gradually and effectively purge ones system of numerous things, people, places, habits and relationships that are no longer beneficial to you. The people, habits, places, things, relationships, etc. that will serve you in the long term, not just along the road but once you have reached your destination ….those shall abide. What we see before our commitment to this journey changes as we go along. The crystalline vision comes ever closer as our understanding of the ultimate goal comes into sight. One needs the energy of divine love to reach divine love. That is only accomplished through surrender. In this way, one discovers compassion, compassion for others but most importantly compassion for oneself. This is where true authenticity begins. It is a long road, the Initiate will go through peaks and valleys and rivers and streams to reach what only becomes clearer as the path unfolds! If one can withstand and persevere, one will find the true integration of Self as its reward, indeed, a destination worth the effort to reach!


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